At the risk of sounding like a broken record, the drow as represented on our server are as close as can be to the source material, which is always what we strive for.
We have no plans to adjust the drow any further. The ECL +2 is considered justified on account of the powers that subrace gets. Consider as well that they are not facing restrictions as harsh as they would in P&P. Drow are in a good place. High level ones are usually quite successful and their magic resistance often helps them get the better on even higher level characters. There is no need to intervene and change the current balance.
Of ECL in general, it is successful in acting as a deterrent to limit unusual races. This is reason enough to keep as is. D&D is a game where classes and races are inherently different from each other. This automatically induces imbalances between those. These differences are quite fine. It allows for challenges of different levels. Playing an ECL race is one of those challenges at your disposal. To be embraced or not as you prefer. But ECL+2 is part of the drow deal, and here to stay, as is.
I mean, can't we just make it so that this arbitrary experience push is gotten rid of? I'm talking about how ECL characters cannot do relevant level content and get experience for it, such as the Gremishka cave or the Beetle cave. Most people I know would be fine with ECL if it means we could just do things with our friends and fellow players instead of being a burden to them all throughout our experience. If it takes ECL characters fifty times of doing the Gremishka cave rather than the ten times that normal characters get to achieve that level up, I would be fine with it.
Also, let ECL characters enchant at 12 since they're ECL 14. Either they're not ECL 14 or they are, why are we hitting ECL characters both ways in this regard?
I know you mentioned that this deterrent for playing ECL is meant to make it a miserable experience, and it still can be, but could there at least be some slack given with this? We're here for collaborative RP after all and at least give a perk of being ECL for those ECL races that, while may be close to the source material such as Drow, are entirely overrated and underperforming for that 2 level penalty. I mean if we were after powerbuilds with subraces, we would have just picked Sylvanesti with no ECL penalty.