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Author Topic: A pamphlet featuring a song appears in Berez and the Vallaki Outskirts  (Read 295 times)

diestormlie

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"Hob-Nail Boots" - A song of the Vallaki Garda

[The Writing, in the Common Tongue, is neat and consistent, regular enough to look press-printed at first glance, though careful examination reveals that it is in fact hand written]

[The lyrics are annotated with Dementlieuese musical notation, presenting the intended melody and cadence]

I ploughed my halberd through your daughter last night
I fined you five hundred for speaking Luktar tonight
Oh something's telling me boy, that you're avoiding me
And so when I find you, a beating it'll be!


[Chorus]
Oh I've got a brand new shiny halberd and a pair of hob-nail boots
I've got a lovely new shirt of chain and a lovely orange suit
And  when we walk the Outskirts, Oh we hold each other's hands
We are the Vallaki Garda and we'll kill you where you stand!

[Chorus]

My  good friend Anton, in the Garda's he's a star
Searching for contradband, he'll go near and far
But up around by Berez, he'll keep himself well clear
The only contraband he'd find are the bullets in his rear!


[Chorus]

My good friend Magda, she was a Guard in Vallaki
Prettiest of them I'd say, I'm sure you would agree
But the merchants by the Sanct'ry won't be seeing her anymore
Go see her at Prancing Nymph, she'd rather be a whore!

[Chorus]

My good friend Nicu, of the Garda he's the best
He's got the finest bladework, always snazzy dressed
But there's just one little problem, dear Nicu's plight
He'll freeze up nice and quickly if he ever actually fights!


[Chorus]

My good friend Toma, it was a real tragedy
He was in the Garda, the finest ever seen
Vallaki put him in charge, of finding foreign spies
But Toma pulled it o'er them all as a Gundarak in disguise!


Oh I've got a brand new shiny halberd and a pair of hob-nail boots
I've got a lovely new shirt of chain and a lovely orange suit
And  when we walk the Outskirts, Oh we hold each other's hands
We are the Vallaki Garda and we'll kill you where you stand!
We are the Vallaki Garda and we'll kill you where you stand!

--Captain Iceflint