Where did one begin it wasn't the first time Alan was in trouble with the Vallaki law but this was the first they actually set a bounty. What amused him was the presumption of smuggling when it was cleared the item itself was disassembled and the law to frugal to determine the differences. So once more he was staving off Bounty Hunters he really didn't want to kill anyone it wasn't in his nature but Seiglinde had made a point today by showing him the wanted add from Vallaki and the fact the Ezrite Church was further betraying him. It was all too amusing how these people were quick to judge, ridicule, and turn their backs on another. He had decided to run after speaking with the Kind Garda whose name now escaped him. He didn't want to assault him but used Flash Powder to try to blind him when it was certain he was receiving a death penalty. What wounded him more was how bitter Martel was to sell him out Alan knowing they were not of the best of terms but for the Inquisitor to be so petty to rat him out was beyond Alan's measure of restraint for the hate he had now flowing for the Ezrite Inquisitor. Not only did he soil his name to the church, he had taken Viorela his friend away and even brainwashed her to see him as lower than dirt. A part of Alan owed Martel for sparing his life but at this point he did not think he could offer same kindness not after once again he had betrayed Alan.
It was too much the trouble with the Ezrites were the beginning he had hope to snoop around for the Invidians again per last time but the more he stayed in Vallaki the more Alan knew he was going to get in trouble or waste his time. The Ezrites have become a reasonable force there and their actions have become noticeable to both the Vistani and many Outlanders. It was painful to have Outlanders know you and ask you to assure them the Ezrites meant no harm... but he couldn't lie to them the possibility was apparent given their layman Alphonse and some of their Anchorites. But Alan was one man and they were five or more Seasoned Strong as well as united. They are aware of his counter measures even though he never had intention to use them merely set aside for the worst case scenario. But Martel... that vicious man that loathsome man twisted his words as if it were an act against the church to faithfully rich in blindness to understand the view of an Outlander. Alan felt foolish he had hope the dreams of Ezra would finally lead him to answers but it only lead him to misery. He still felt beholden to her yet what could he do to prove to the church he was not the villain the Inquisitor wrongfully portrayed him. Yes he could confess he was not one to follow like others, yes he was not one to simply follow a square and not think outside the box, but he was a good man with a good heart.
All lights in this Realm technically belonged to Ezra, each light needed guidance, and protection but to spern them to chastise them Alan didn't feel like the other Anchorites he didn't feel it was necessary to verbally beat down these outlanders who have lost everything. But Martel was seen as a good man... He was just another Zachary lost in his own Faith. Maybe Alan was no better... His pleas and his console fell on deaf ears many of times. Now, now he had to worry of Bounty Hunter and the Ezrites he was not an evil man nor did he see himself as a criminal. He did what he had to do as an outsider he was not a Barovian... he was a Heartlander. Their laws were broken and misconceived with corrupt and unjustifiable Guards. Maybe Vladamir was right perhaps some one needed to remove them all.... but it wasn't going to be Alan he wouldn't take a life less he was forced too. Alan recall that day with the Murdred Vistani he had no choice to fight against their assailants but the feeling left him queasy and sickened. How would he handle such if he became a Soldier of the Fox. Even then his troubles would persue him and he did not wish to bring anything poor on Sieglinde, Remi, and Beatrice's door but he didn't know any other options.
There was another... one he had hope to seek brother Fabio something he wanted to try and see... If Alan could somehow survive the trial to becoming an Anchorite maybe they will see the truth, listen to him, perhaps even forgive him. Even so that would not change his feelings toward Martel and the others in the Vallaki Sect... He would always remain distrustful of them always remain vigilant to ensure they did not cross the line. But who was he to stop them, who was he to change them, he was nobody a nothing in this horrid realm. Since a long time Alan missed Faerun he couldn't figure why he was needed here or why the great spirits beckoned him to this horrid twisted land of darkness. Even starring up at the stain glass of Ezra in Port he beckoned to her and called to her asking for clarity to all this madness. "You call to me, you ask me to leave my goddess Meilikki's side. I walked among your chosen and only received bitterness am I an Outlander not worthy of Ezra? I had sought to protect those from the Night from the Mist that you so wish to prevent from claiming so many innocent. I am not a perfect man I am not pure like some of your chosen but my heart is good. I may not agree with society but change is inevitable in the Grand Scheme of things. If this is your trial to me then I will do my best but I am alone, frighten, and in need of your guidance... Goddess what shall I do? My heart burns for vengeance for the Inquisitors betrayal and damage but I also yearn acceptance from you and your fold. I am whom I am if I must change it must be for the better. Otherwise I ask you if you not need of me if the dreams meant nothing then let me know.... but I can't simply leave this land or walk away. So many good people live here so many I want to protect..."
"Ren had lost her love and she mourns though he chose his path she was denied closure... Elana turned from you and walked down a dark path because of her tragedy with Lyssa and yet it is okay for a Red vardo Mariska to slay her in cold blood and steal the Vistani's treasure not even allowing the woman a proper burial... Even Elric a man who worships a Deamon still held reasonable amount of honor. You spoke it clear if those of the Night turn from the Mist then they are yours. But how can I turn them... how can I bring them to the light when I must face odds like your Chosen Martel a man blinded by his own words. A judge you deemed chosen and yet here I am a man who seeks no ill will or desire to kill your flock. I shared with him a truth because I had trust in him and he betrayed my trust? Now I am certain he and the others will pursue me and I do not wish to snuff your chosen lights... its madness. I did no wrong but follow my heart. There is no definitive black or white there is always Gray. But I must thank you however for allowing Sielginde to hear me and offer me truth of what has transpired. Protect her better than me I'm not worthy... although I wish to be. Please do not let those who hunt me wish my life.... I do not wish it so... I fear if it is as such that the Night will claim me as my heart has grown bitter to this madness and death. such unfair death such tragedy..."
Alan could not help but pray kneeling. "Goddess Ezra she whose light clears the way. In the Grand Scheme of all things the challenges before me are merely the workings of events yet to be unfold. Please spare my sister Laura and my friend Beatrice any grievance in my passing.... I have few love ones in this land. So many promises to keep... The Vistani wish my aid in finding their compass... I owe that to Elana for being a coward for not being there. I am weak and yet I oppose challenges greater than me and I am alone... all I have left is you. I beseech you guide me give me a sign... I confess I was wrong to prepare against your Anchorites but I spoke truth because they deserved to know... to know that people do fear them that people do prepare against them. But it was never in me to kill them I can slay monsters but taking a life of another person... is never easy. Since that day with Elana and those Thieves.... Every day I try to make a difference. I confess I have sinned I am selfish in my desires to protect those I love and those I fear need protection. I wish to be your shield and rampart guide them in a way to you through me. All I wish to do is live up to my mother's legacy and help people saving lives. I know my means aren't the best but I am one man and alone. If you would accept me bestow your light upon me I would do everything I can to preserve every light even those with in the Night those even with in the Light... I don't truly know your Anchorites or your church but through your scriptures I've learned of you. And I feel you are far more benevolent than those of the church so I beseech you forgive me I confess before you and only you for my heart is now and forever yours Goddess as you were the one who called me and made me more through trial."
Rising Alan sighed his other option was completing the Trial Fabio had mention Layman took to become an Anchorite if he could do this maybe the church would accept him... Perhaps he had already made Ezra wait long enough. Either way he would die some day he felt it better dying fighting in what you believe in. Perhaps even if he shouldn't if he succeed he would find the compassion to forgive Martel and the others an reunite them with Ezra in a way unique and wholesome. Fiently he smiled wishfully but knew the reality of this land was so cruel.