Writing on the old bones - Warji

[Snowflame]

~ Day I ~

So today was rather interesting... it would appear that my friends have forgotten all I have done for them, Dumas... Dumas and I were quite the business partners; but money walks. It's a shame he didn't contact me i'd actually have quite a bit of coin for him... although looks like the only coin he'll be getting will be under his tongue to pay the ferryman. Tatiana, never did the woman nothing wrong, probably a dumb pawn of something bigger than her. The worst is my Cozette... my lovely lovely Cozette... why Cozette... the others I can understand. Dumas was always a greedy tool and a mediocre merchant who knows only of coin, Tatiana is a whore... I mean that speaks for itself; but Cozette? A lovely Dementliese noble woman with long beautiful raven black hair, a face of a goddess, one who shared the same sick dark pleasures that I had shared. That smile, those eyes. I removed those vicious scars, cursed the man who ruined her, and I showered her with love, gifts and affections. Raping her out of rage was something that I had simply done wrong, but I thought about it and wanted to move on. Told her too... it's a shame it will have to come to this. Five men came to visit me in my own home to try and slay me... my best friend, my fiancee', some girl I rescued from an demented midget caliban... and two others whom I don't even personally know. Cozette has the most reason to strike at me, but an assassination squad because I made a very bad mistake? It's gone too far. The lot of them are idiots however, even with five they couldn't manage to capture me... it's as d'ey say "None truly defeat a wizard". That also says something about their personal strength... Cozette I always knew was a weak fighter, but Dumas who calls himself a merchant and a mercenary... a joke. A merc is supposed to be able to carry out his job alone, no need to sneak either just walk in crossbows firing and swords slashing. Tatiana a useless gypsy... yeah self explanatory, the other two equally useless. Watching Dumas fumble on the power of my shadow tentacles was something quite funny... They were far too obvious too... I knew something was up the moment the one known as "Cosgrove" spoke. "Rest being a possibility", Irony is she inteded that "Rest" be the other possibility. This doctor isn't ready for rest. This doctor has far more interesting plans than that.

Only Cozette is worthy of sparing life, but even she I sincerely doubt can be spared...  While I am tempted to the others say not to forgive her and the pain caused to me isn't nearly as great as death would be to her. They tell me in their own special way... not like that. These are the people I love, my family... John, Elodie, Meribo, Scox...and so many more I would not dare record on this old bone. Took care of me when no one else would. Much like I did to Cozette... my loyalty to my allies. I think I will promise Cozette a quick and painless death should the time come.. I don't want her to suffer, but death is deserved.

Oh Warji! look on the bright side of things, you needed a break anyway, and you've successfully out witted five assailants at once. The idiots couldn't even surround properly, the lot of them, Tatiana in particular aren't even combat trained properly! gah... positive thinking positive thinking...

[Carved is several fun drawings and self likenesses in the bone]

Enough doodling, I look forward to seeing wat more is to come... I am thinking about heading home to Sourange for a year. don't know... having no plan can be better than having a plan.

[Snowflame]

~ Entry II ~

So I woke up this morning and the old man got back a certain someone... he saved her for me... I love my family! [smiley face is drawn here]

[Snowflame]

~ Entry III ~

"ooooooh! look at me! i'm Dumas!" [The witch doctor is prancing and dancing wearing Dumas's Mustache, it's amazing how the doctor kept it one piece]



"Bloody hell!, BOLLOCKS! GUNPOWDA!, I GOT GUNPOWDA! BWAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA..."

This will be a smash hit at parties... I love it! I can be black Dumas!

[Suddenly there is a long line of drawings of warji with a Dumas' mustache running around in town past garda and everything. The people and garda are completely fooled by his "clever" disguise]

Oh Loa... if only that would actually work.

I am over Cozette... I need to move on, that Anje woman however... she won't do. She probably couldn't deliver in bed anyway! I need a REAL woman, with REAL coitus, and a REAL heir... My family of blood has had children for generations... I mean after all i'm here right? I miss Kaytee! I took her on one date... ONE. Wasn't bad date... Wax house in Dementlieu, I don't really like black girls much but I could enjoy her. We also had quite a bit in common, I wonder if she kept the shrunken heads of her family on her as well? I GOT MINE!!! [Smiley face is drawn here]

[The doctor starts laughing yet again and begins running around wearing dumas' moustache] "CRIKEY! DAT WARJI FREAK IS ALL SIXES AND SEVENS! CHEERS BIG EARS! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" [Those in the "Church" might hear him from time to time trying Dumas' English accent while wearing the mustache]

I should name this little ball of hair... what shall I call my mustache? ... Terrance? Phillip? ... Terrance AND Phillip!? no... I shall call it... Dum-Ass. YES!. I got the DUM-ASS right here, man!

[and again...] "TIME FOR TEA AND CRUMPETS! TIME FOR TEA AND CRUMPETS!"

I must not forget to record this torture so that I may look back and laugh...

It began rather simply, Sava left his armor on... he did this LAST TIME. I love our father and the family but... CAN WE NOT LEARN FROM PAST MISTAKES!? It was no matter... I began by destroying his will with a spell... the world become a realm of nightmares in his eyes only, the wickedness of my bad juju and tattoos came alive before him all growling and sneaking with sheer evil malice... I became a true monster in his eyes only, every action done become more nightmarish than it may actually be, Sava asked to keep him alive... which I SORTA did... but gaaah... headache, I hate that Anje woman. She just doesn't get it. When he is released this will probably scar his mind for a very, very, long time. I doubt he will forget the things he saw... I could only imagine what he saw in that nightmare world...

Me and this wonderful Dorf I think was named Legnar... oh! NOTE TO SELF: Buy that dwarf a gift!, also remember to go out later and bring the blind man some herbs... poor bastard doesn't even know it's winter [frowning face drawn here]. Very kind and helpful carrying him and doing the more dirty physical work I needed done without question! If only Scox were here... I miss that little bastard! After scaring the ever living nightsoil out of that mans mind, I simply defiled his flesh weakening and exhausting it in everyway I could image... loss of strength, loss of skill, a deadly curse, and then we finally brought him to the chamber.... [the hand writing changes vastly here]

I DID WHAT I DID BEFORE. I NEEDED THAT FEEL OF DARK EUPHORIA IN MY MIND.... THAT TORTURE THAT FEELING OF PURE DARK FORCE LIKE WHAT HAPPENED WITH OGHAM I TURNED INTO A LOADAMNED FAIRY WITH TWO KNIVES FLEW INTO HIS EARS

I CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT YELLED AND SCREAMED INTO HIS EARDRUMS I LEFT BUT NOTHING!!!! NOTHING AT ALL!!!! NOT EVEN A HINT OF THAT DARK POWER!!!

[The hand writing goes back to normal now]

Oh and I cut his mustache off before that happened too...

then I went inside him further, cutting up his uvula and chipping his already disgusting teeth.... haha I wrote my name on one of his teeth! The dwarf did some work on the outside all while I was inside his body... I don't quite remember what he did exactly something with a vial... I don't know...after that I gave him a truly terrible disease vommitting and throwing up... but I also weakened his entire body strength so that he would have to hurt himself to force it out. finally, I stabbed him repeatedly and reminded him that he would never bone Cozette. Ever. The dwarf healed him and we brought him back to the cage, he was living by then but the dwarf left unfortunately... I was speaking to my Ex-Lover one last time, and then Anje came in eaves dropping, butted into a conversation she knows was important to me but I doubt she cares.

Going to take moment to express my strong dislike for her, I respect her as sister but... damn. She's less so much devoted to the cult and the family as much as she is devoted to the old man. I can understand devotion to the old man, but we are united by the force of Nerull, not necessarily the old man. The old man plays a vital role, in keeping us together he is the father of this FAMILY, not HER father... well sort of but she does not treat her brothers and sisters at all. Instead she showed sympathy for Cozette, and Dumas. I can understand her wanting to keep the ugly rogue alive, I told her just five more minutes of his suffering. She spent an hour arguing with me instead, she was fully capable of helping me but chose not to because she wanted to see me in trouble. Final Verdict? Useless. with a capital U.

Everyone has a place in the family unit, I am the only active arcanist at the moment, and a very loyal follower... I mean my tongue speaks for itself. I'm sorry your not going to argue with the man who bit his own tongue off for the cult. It's just not happening, the devotion is too strong. My job is to help new recruits, do the cult and Sava's bidding to the very best of my abilities, bring in money when I can, and help train and test new recruits.

Whats her job? Healing and writing stuff down that's general cult knowledge. The old man says he trusts her judgement, therefore she thinks she's above us all... if anything i'm above her. Even so though she is my sister and I will respect her as such, i'd rather her not get in trouble with Sava as much as I dislike her. Trying to get me in trouble with the old man... for Cozettes sake? is she stupid? Oh wait I don't need to answer that... she is.

I sent the old man a letter detailing that I want her to stay away from me. Me and her don't get along and I have a feeling in the case of an emergency she would leave the lot of us hanging to save her own life or just the old mans life. I am a doctor... everyone who is important needs to be treated... she is a simple thrall of the old man and doesn't realize it. I'll probably just treat her stupid, to get her to shut up. She reminds me of my sister... only Anje is not so much a whore.

I'm going to close this entry now... doctor needs sleep, and head ache herbs.

[Snowflame]

Entry IV

Traitors...

More and more of them just keep rollin' in... dammit Sava. Things just aren't the way they used to be... I miss the old folks... Magau, ... [drawn with a slight heart around her name] Kaytee, ...SCURVY.

One of my mentors... poor poor Scurvy. I actually am sorry for all the times I have accused Belauch of being a traitor... I really do... these guys... it's just, this new cult...

I hate Anje, acting like a witch... Rylat'ar is an obvious back stabber... I mean he even SAID SO HIMSELF, that dumb dwarf follows him around... no self respecting dwarf follows something as girly as an ELF around.

I have Scox... [smiley face is drawn here]

AH yes! My loveable little Caliban friend... always a delight... he really understands me. him and the old man really understand me... Anje.

I like some of these new faces, Krosk isn't so bad, Legnar is great,

John Hampton and his girl are around... why can't I find one as faithful as Elodie? I bet Elodie is good bed lover too. I have not seen "First" in a long time either... ever since the one called Janos was taken from us by the vardo... the place split... the drain, went down the drain.
I must do what I can to preserve the cult... remove the weak links and traitors... permanently.

[Snowflame]

Entry V

Today is a wonderful day! I could almost sing, I could dance, I could maim.

Oh! I did that today!

Apostol is wisening up to my ways... the amusement in others suffering, the pain oh the unbearable pain.

The old man allowed me full unrestricted torture of Princess Dumas, the ugliest princess in england.

[The witch doctor lets out a hideous howling laughter as he always does, stationed himself by the cell room. not even the forum is safe from warji's  twisted tortures as he screams and howls like a mad man all through out the night as he dances with wild NAKED tribal drums taking some moments to keep writing]

Delia and puppy were a lie! I have saved my beloved Larien from the twisted evils that plagued her mind... Cozette is stupid witch that has made Lariens imagination believe she was some slave girl named Delia and Puppy. That simply won't do, as I did with Dumas I did with Delia earlier that morning... peeled away her mind with the voodoo that I do... reminded her who she was...

Larien will make a wonderful bride! This one certainly won't fail...

Tonight however was Dumas... Princess Dumas of England...

"OoooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHWH AHA HAHAGHGHAHAHHAHAHAAGHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!"

[a hideous laughing howl escapes from the doctors maw as he writes down the words: "Princess Dumas of England"]

I utterly destroyed his mind, without any question... although there was more to it... Everyone in the cult has been giving me a bunch of crap...

Anje and her witchy acting like she's smarter, That skinny under elf, and others... they all doubt me and my methods...

Tonight information of great importance has been released...

Let the spirit of my ancestors be known, APOSTOL. I wish to be your adoptive son, and tonight I single handedly found out EVERYTHING you so desired to know...

Locations, information regarding traitors, and even the source of my problems...

Anje knew what was up and she shut her mouth. She knows better than to doubt me now.

I am a psychopath, a lunatic... all words are good descriptors of me but I think there is only one that can really sum me up nicely,

Boogeyman.

forever to haunt the nightmares of Dumas and many others... maybe even Cozette...

Some call me "The Black Witch", others "White Face"... but regardless it's what I do that defines me... That peglegged garda doesn't got squat on me.... I'm tempted to capture him and show him how to torture... the man doesn't have the faintest clue.

It's funny I've never seen or heard of people actually care about Cozette... I know there was like a few... maybe one or two... but damn.

THE GIRL GOT RAPED

I mean boohoo!?

Is all this really worth it Cozette? if only you were here now to see how broken I am making your friends, how I am stripping them of their sanity just as I stripped you down before I made you my whore. I think I won this war... they're not going to get me, they can't even manage to sneak up on me...

Tatiana hides, Dumas is... Dumas isn't even Dumas anymore... just a shell of his former self..., Cozette twisted and mangled, and now even more will die because they decided to chase me.

Don't you guys think it is time to throw in the towel? I'm sure there is something more interesting to chase... I mean I raped one stupid girl and they all got scared.

I need to speak with the old man immediately, humorously even he is afraid of me... says I am too cruel and vicious. The old man hasn't the faintest clue just how wicked I can be. My information is too valuable to send around the church swift action must take place, I won't allow Dumas to leave until the information is used... what a sad worthless swine of a woman.

I'll bite my own tongue off for my family,but they? they break. they break under me. Those who think I truly am not family in this cult, perish. Die in a hole. I live for my family, my loved ones, and i'll destroy for them as well. The old man thinks i'm much too macabre.... cutting my own face off just to scare Dumas. There is no such thing as "Much too" anything for my family. Not even Anje can snap at me like she did before. She simply knows better.

The oldman isn't really dark, he never was. Not truly dark anyway. The oldman wants to leave these lands, leave the mists...me? I like it here! Why would I want to go anyw'ere else? the only home I know wit' people, broken people disheartened by the world around them....

A Carnival of sorrows, a amusement park of murder, a party of torment...

This is my world.

[Snowflame]

Entry VI - Good Night Sweet Princess

LIES AND SLANDER! That is all Dumas is and ever was... why he was just a figment of imagination nothing real about Dumas...

This "Gunpowder" nonsense? Not real, Dumas is all in our imaginations. I have freed Daisy from Dumas' prison... poor poor girl

[After this writing, those who inhabit the church can again hear the wild wailing laughter of the witch doctor as he writes of his success]

The entire room, the church, everything staged so beautifully... The dagger father allowed me to use... oh the sweet dagger that drew the dark powers toward me when I tortured Ogam...  The old man told me not to kill Dumas... I succeeded... Dumas lives in body... but mind and perhaps even soul? I have murdered him... Only apostol understands my need in the cult and the use for my talents... Anje hates to admit them, Lavinia the new recruit is a naive idiot who burst into tears from my actions on Daisy... she must have loved Daisy...

I CAN'T SUPPORT DEVIANTS!

[Another loud howling laughter from the doctor as he continues his wicked and twisted writing]

I have freed Daisy and sent the poor girl to zarcrof to she could learn to be a lady again... I 'aven't slept in days!

[the doctor passes out, which is why I didn't say anything to sava thismorning or to anyone when they got back from zarcroft ]

[Snowflame]

Vacation time!

What to do what to do... I did need some relaxation

[Snowflame]

"Warji Apostol"

Fathers own adopted son... only he and a few of the smarter folks see and understand me and my methods. The idiots think that i'm a huge menace for spending sleepless nice screaming and howling just to instill fear into Dumas. These people do not understand, there is an art to breaking people, there is an art to creating nightmares, there is an art to torture, there is an art to murder. I the artist, my staff the brush, the world my canvas...

Some men like to watch the world burn, I paint the world burning... and it does. Everything has calmed down, hopefully the internal fighting stops although I doubt it considering father is ... senile. I respect him and love him as a father, and I respect his wishes. That does not mean I necessarily agree... that drow and Lavinia I KNOW are back stabbing scum. If it wasn't so blatantly obvious, they seriously should just wear a sign that says "I HATE NERULL" the dark one doesn't know any trickery or influence. The idiot thinks people fall for the stupidest tricks such as him pretending to be a homosexual just to get me and a poor caliban to leave the room. The elf blows up when he see's a lighter of the brood. A true cultist does not care of race, or politics. We are bound by one force, and that force is Nerull.

This vacation has done me rather good... I need more time though, for more power... the more power I have the better off I am defending myself, and my family from our enemies and inside foes who wish to only stab us in the back.

Where is Larien... I need some love

[Snowflame]

Father want's me to train more and more, I have recently come across some new knowledge, and oh loa does it feel good. I cannot wait to see how well all of these work in the field...

I met a woman yesterday that I would know as "Mother" a vampiress... tricked me and poor Larien with her morning lord outfit. Rather rude if you ask me. I should prepare for fighting vampires anyway, I know as soon as Cozette get's out of that looney bin, if she get's out she's going to come back for vengeance, and chances are she will be a vampire. Cozette is not to lay a hand on me... not that I think she could anyway... preparation for her wrath should be rather simple. As usual people take me for simple minded and primitive due to my tribal roots... such underestimation will be the downfall of my enemies. All of them will stupidly fall one by one. Many think they can try to ruin my name with the cult by simply talking... the idiots... if only Sava was more vocal about his children and their status. I do suppose however, it helps weed out the traitors by making everyone think they are equals to one another.

I am a lieutenant, and Sava's own adopted son. Of course no one but me, Larien, and father care about that. Carelessness however leads to death and damnation.

My brother Og appears to rather enjoy my company it would seem... I took him out hunting and he kept trying to model his clothes after me. Never seen that of other members... I will not take advantdge of his allegiance. Og, looks up to his older brother. I will take care of him as an older brother should their younger.

[Snowflame]

Anje, Anje... they call you a caretaker. Why don't you take care of your mouth and shut it! I can't stand the way the church is, Lavinia and Anje... them and their female problems. Freaking out whenever they don't get what they want no matter how stupid or useless it is. Today is funny, she thinks she is overlord of the Morninglord Church, that her word is the word of God's above. I shut down her idea and made her look stupid today... she starts crying and carrying on making a huge show. "Oh the awful witch doctor such a nuisance to this cult". Ever since she came along she did one thing and one thing only: Bark. She barked like a female dog. Probably because she is one! I go to check and see if Lavinia and our new brother is okay, she slams the door. Okay, I hope were rats eat her, really do. Unlike others i'm too faithful to my father to kill my brothers and sisters. As much as they want to.

I reveal information in regards to a certain shorter party... they ignore it and say "Screw it let's just go forward and not think about this at all". I don't really care about that though, what a clown. Anje made such a scene... I have seen children throw more mature temper tantrums than that. A Sacrifice maybe we should use fathers sacrificial knife! or  a scythe or a sickle a SYMBOL OF NERULL.

she picks some stupid Rokuma kawaii whip whatever thing up. As if that is a weapon used by Nerull. then when I try gentle suggestions, the old female dog starts barking and barking saying I would make a mockery. Mean while she's using a weapon that is not only not inherently dark like fathers dagger, but some stupid thing that barley resembles the symbol of Nerull. Scythe or Sickle. it's not hard to pick up a weapon from the store!

I can't stand these people anymore... what happened... what happened to my friends? Those bastards, those Red Vardo Bastards driving us out of the drain were all the fun was. Why do they even attack us? Just to get on the counts good side!? there was no reason!

Rest in Peace Scurvy, really man. Scurvy dies, John and Elodie can't stand the moron's so they leave, Scox is out doing nothing, Magau is probably at home relaxing, Kaytee... the wax museum was so nice...

There's the thing that get's me to calm down when I am aggravated. I took her out on the nicest date I could afford in Dementlieu... The wax museum was wonderful that night. I had gone before but never have I went with someone. I wanted to take Cozette, she said she already had went. Thing with Kaytee was, we both have already been... we just wanted to go together.

It was my last memory of her... lovley lovley ebon skinned beauty. I am not much of a poet, but perhaps I will write of you one day.

My last memory of Scurvy... we spoke behind that heathen church of sun... he told me he was in danger... there was other issues going on at the moment... everyone was focused on a cat, keeping safe, and other things... I should have helped! Scurvy was- oh wait that wasn't my last memory of him... was a vivid one though. I remember speaking to him in a deep chamber of the drain...

If only I knew that would be the very last time... oh Loa... oh my family... what has become of you?

I should have been there for Scurvy! no one else cared, no one else heard his desires for help... he even wanted to pay me! I told him he didn't need to and that he was my brother. No one would ever do this now, nobod in this cult of Nerull would now!

Warji, Warji... living in the past man... is what I would think, but the past is more of a distraction from the horrors of the now.

I am absolutely disgusted. I'd leave right now if I didn't care for Sava as much as I do. Scox too, the people who remained, the people who stayed my brother instead of pushing against me like idiots. Fathers friendliness will be the downfall I assure it. Meeting new people, meeting not only new people WORTHLESS AND UNLIKABLE PEOPLE. I think of all the new folks I have met, mother. Mother is the only one. I can learn quite a deal from her I believe... she was Scurvy's mother...

I will assist her in any revenge she plans to take... Scurvy was a friend and a mentor... one of the last family I had. This drow, the stupid girls! I'm really getting sick of the women! Anje and Lavinia... One's a domna dog, the other is so childish... it's like they took a ten year olds soul and put it into a grown woman's body. it's nasty. I would never sleep with that it would feel so wrong!

Back in the day even the hideous girls were more likable than she was... Chimera and her sister... her sister looked like a wreck last I saw her! but i'd do with that. I totally would get with her, Chimera shares my psychotic ways and for that I liked her... Kaytee was a slice of heaven from home, even Victoria who I have contradictions with plenty can remain stable and i'd still bed that girl.  Anje and Lavinia though? Never.

At least the girls I disliked back in the day I still liked enough to hang out with them and maybe try to get some. I am sick and tired of their childish crap. I'm done. I'm just not going with them, and I love how father puts me with her for work when he knows we don't work together at all. Why would he do this? Whatever it doesn't matter...i'll work around it some how.

[Snowflame]

I never was a drinking man... but i'm one of the men out there who have plenty reason to drink. All of my ex-wives are stupid and looney, the cult is infested with barley sentient organisms, everyone getting hunted, and the oldman has forgotten again how to handle prisoners!!!

But today I look past this... I feel refreshed I feel like old times have come back to me a bit... Ogam, an interesting little elf... not irritating know it alls like the other elves or my other "colleagues". Instead he had an open mind a willingness to learn, he accompanied me on several expeditions into many places before but today was a wonderful transformation... truly this fey is worthy of the title "Warji's Apprentice". This man makes Cozette look like a vegetable. It's too much I couldn't help but laugh, it was a dream come true. A hunting partner that isn't John Hampton, that is actually useful! Not only is he useful but he wishes to learn! The fey genuinely wishes to learn he doesn't just ignorantly brush away my intellect because it makes him feel inferior, he doesn't care about feeling inferior because he knows I have knowledge that I can teach him. This man is a STUDENT. A STUDENT. Oh Loa I could shed tears of joy...

A STUDENT.

A STUDENT.

Someone who knows there place, see's someone with seniority, instead of fighting him to try and look tough he looks up, he looks to learn he looks to become someone just like me or greater. This is an individual truly worthy of my respects. I have not met anyone like this since I have met Meribo. I did as Scox, Scurvy, and The Old man have done for me to him... I will mentor this man. I will be an important individual in his life and goddammit I will not fall to hell just leave this man in the dust. This is my student, my family member, someone I can truly be proud of.



It's so sweet, mimicking is the greatest and most sincere form of flattery after all... and of course I will allow him to wear similar garbs to my very own. Ogam has learned already the first step in being a master: "Know your place, know your friends, know how to make friends, and know when to run". This is how I survived I made friends with people, not make enemies and act like a total know it all. I came to learn things I didn't understand not toss them aside believing that I simply knew everything. This is what people like those troublemakers in the cult don't understand.

Is how to survive, how to be creative, how to set aside difference and understand that you are family, like it or not. Through think and through thin. Ogam, I swear on to you man. I swear... I will take good care of you... even though I carved an image of a genital into your arm... we can look past that! not like you know anyway...

[the witch doctor chuckles softly as he writes this... as if good memories have been returning to that skull of his]

I remember when we got Ogam... it was a day in the drain... he was like me... he underwent a trial... I didn't think much of him... I never really think much of fey folk except for my lover Larien. but this one... was nay like tha others... just so willing to learn and share and work together instead of being a complete self absorbed imbecile.

Ogam, your safety is mine, should harm or death come to you man... those with the blood on their hands will suffer such exotic cruelties.

[Snowflame]

The past few days have been rather quiet... as if everyone was watching a barrel of gun powder-

[stops writing a moment and puts on Dumas' mustache]

The past few days have been a tad like tea time, quiet. It's like everyone is watching a bloody lit fuse connected to...

GUNPOWDER!!!!!

"Gunpowda! GUN POWDA! LOOK AT ME! I SELL DA GOODS MON I GOT YOUR GUN POWDA HERE! WAIT A TIC, THE BLEEDIN' BARRELS ABOUT TA EXPLODE!"

[Howling laughter escapes the witch doctor as he has his fine and eve starts stroking and twirling his mustache as Dumas once did]

I dare say, my old chap Ogam is quite a sport he is. Me mate fancies my cloth, staff, and attire a loyal old bean is all this old duffer needs I say! brought the fine chap all over for a bit of travel I did.

Luvvly-jubbly when we got to the mist camp. All the nutters there! they're all sixes and sevens with their knickers in a bunch.

[the writing starts getting sloppy as the witch doctor laughs with Dumas' mustache on. he could only dream the torment he is in... the witch doctor actually starts laughing so hard he's crying]

"IT 'URTS! IT 'URTS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Crikey! i'm tearin' up! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

[he takes a moment to catch his breath]

We avoided those old duffers though, the cat approached me with the old mans staff to try and scare me, I just laughed at the little bugger. Such a nancy boy that Lucadia chap is...

"PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... AGGHGH AHUHUHUAHHAUHHUEEUHEUHEUHEHAHAAHAHAHA... ahahaha...ahaha... ah... *COUGH COUGH* ah.... snnnnrrrkkkkk!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHEHE HEHEEHEHAAA!"

[the witch doctor takes his mustache off]

"Nope dat's it... i'm done too much tonig't I need a break!"

[Snowflame]

There is two things a fine upstanding Souragneian black man could want from the world: Money and Power... and girls...
three things there are three things: Money, Power, and girls.

I managed... actually quite a few of these things... money isn't too hard to come by, the girls have gone slim... but I still have Larien. Power? I suppose being the powerful voodan that I am is power, but not the political, and marketable power...

Let's make some money Warji...

Got lucky and ran into quite the individual today in Dementlieu... i'll be making 5% of his earnings monthly. I even funded him some... nine thousand solars. As long as I make over nine thousand three hundred solars I have profited from this mans eternal debt to me.

If not... well... maybe he should join my relatives...



Unlike Dumas however, this dressed up dandy-

"Gah eheheeeee...' [The witch doctor puts on dumas' mustache again]

this chap is all dressed up, powder wig and all the trimmings... but quite interested in my shrunken heads curious how they got the shape... perhaps he is into the morbid curiosities that the Witch Doctor can provide him?

Ogam had a rough night...

[takes the mustache off, seems he wasn't feeling it tonight]

I got him just in time but that was a whole other set of garbage... cost me a bit to bring him back but it's okay, it was mere pocket change for what a man like me can acquire...

5% from one source... now I need another source of income other than monsters and dungeoneering... surely there must be come business I can provide a service to... but who?