The pangs in my chest have become weirdly more and more frequent. If I had to find a relation between them and anything which has changed, in a radical way, I cannot really say anything new or consistent happened. I have had the need to be visited by a doctor, doctor Alan Kingscrest. He took me in that inn in one of the best areas of Vallaki named The Blue Water. And yes, my senile self could proof there were commodes in the room. I removed quietly all my clothes, cleaned myself properly. It was some days I had not a proper bath, the Lady's Resting being more affordable for my actual finances but definitely it is missing of many commodities. It was quite a long time I did not who my naked body to any man. I have had quite a healthy way of living myself too not to be in need even of doctors. I watched myself in one of those elegant mirror, and I could not help noticing that the age is striking me, the skin becoming less smooth, even my several tattoes somehow discolouring. My body of a former dancer is slowly decaying. I am becoming a vintage wine.
***
In the half-collapsed church of the worshippers of the Sun I saw many adventurers. I could do nothing to help them. I watched many couples. Young boys playing the heroes to protect their maidens. It was so pictoresque. And then I held Trebuchet in my arms. The found son of a hin. The pangs became stronger, but the little child was calm with me. Doctor Kingscrest says my pangs are psychological in nature, and I daresay I agree with him. It seems being in this place has stressed more my thoughts about the past, my dismay, my guilt sense. He gave me some tonic. Taste was funny, slightly spirited. I slept for hours like a baby myself. I hope not needing more than this. I've resisted many things in the past because used for enjoyment, never for need, now it might be different.
***
A female elf, name was Lia if memory serves me still, seemed to recognize the name of my child. She said she would have asked to some of her kin-frends. They have long lives, they must have long memories. It is two years ago or so my child left her home in Levkarest, and yes Krezk was her direction. Watching what foreigners and adventurers do here make me think my child might have done the same, risked her life daily, maybe found love, maybe she herself has had a child. Too many questions and no one able to answer me.
***
Note to self. Nudging monsieur Poisson for any new information about my child.
Other note. Deciding when approaching a local Garda to ask for information too. Garda seem of another matter compared to those in Borca. This is a good thing.
***
At the Blue Water I have had a dreamless sleep like those I used to have long ago. I feel refreshened. I must find a way to earn some money here. My ancient bones and limbs deserve comfort, otherwise I might have a collapse of my body. I need to fill this hollow I fill inside. It is clear what it needs to be done.
A.N.