You have been taken by the Mists

Author Topic: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.  (Read 1729 times)

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« on: January 30, 2010, 05:07:31 PM »
Year 765. Beginning of the year.

I have lost my way, I have no clue when and how, just a dizzy memory of someone hitting hard on my head and then waking up besides a Vistani camp. No doubt some of them did me this, but I would never dare accusing them of such. My life has been already rather troublesome without them placing any sort of evil curse upon me. The rest which has happened is not even worth of being told, but I must admit the fact I am stuck in this town full of prejudices, lacking carriages or caravans, seems to be a sign of destiny. Vallaki they call it. Must be one of those villages my caravan passed through twenty and five years ago.

***

I need to find a way back to Krezk at least. Her home in Levkarest was abandoned and in ruins. My former home, where Sandor and me fell in love and spent many a night drinking and dancing in the Kartakan way. What fools we were to move back to Harmonia, I really believed a Borcan might have settled down fine there. Yet he ended in that fight, Borcan pride, almost worse than that of Falkovnians and Invidians. And he died leaving me alone, and pregnant.

***

Note to self. Find out if Barovians know what a wheel is and whether is deliberate or not the fact it is -not- used.
Second note to self. Privies are lacking, yet it seems they have some sort of sewer system. This land seems full of contradictions.

***

I met some of her friends in Levkarest. I had a hard time to persuade them to give me any useful information. It seems my child ended in some troubles, she has too much of her father in her probably. But she was not inside when her home was set on fire. It seems a friend of hers was in, and died. More and more people pointed me Krezk. She must be there. I had some other information. She had worked for a Baroness there in Borca, for instance, and she has won some contests both in fighting and in writing. The real daughter of a Kartakan and a Borcan, indeed. The rise and the fall. Typical. And her apparent problems with the people of Caina and the Church of Ezra. Too many knots to untie in this net.

***

I abandoned her for too long. I was young and fool. And I was risking death in those woods when our caravan was attacked by the Barovian wolves. My poor child needed more cures than I, I sent her as fast as they could to Levkarest. She was born in Barovia, and I almost died at that occasion. And then I withdrew. Too much pressure. A widow and a mother, was nothing I could put up with at twenty years of age. I am old enough not to expect a hug when I meet her. Things have changed too fast for me at the Crystal Club. It is time to make ammend with the past. Now.

A.N.
« Last Edit: January 31, 2010, 06:46:26 AM by +Ciaran+ »
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #1 on: January 31, 2010, 06:46:06 AM »
2nd Month. Year 765.

It seems the way to Krezk is in this period unavailable. Methinks I should even stop looking for a way to try to move westward right now. Barovia is dirty, and unclean, with people who seem at any time on that tiny borderline between sanity and madness. I have found some people who will try to help me to find my child. I will note them down below.

***

I am not sure. I feel some pain in my stomach, right between my lungs, occasionally, not with an impressive regularity. Everytime I have the suspect I am close to her it happens. Methinks it is the instinct of the mother. That instinct which withdrew me for five and twenty years. She will not welcome me with open arms. But maybe this pain in my chest will end for that time.

***

A Red Vardo Trader woman named Selena offered the service of her agency. They are the most reknowed salvagers in the south Core, I am positive if anyone can find a person it's them. What worries me more is payment. A young man offered me a couple of thousand coins and I owe him, but I doubt it will be enough to pay the Traders. At the same time a dark-skinned guy, self-fashioned as "The Seeker", offered his help as well. And I felt free to ask to some monsieur Poisson of the Church of Ezra to check in their records. My child was Borcan in citizenship, as local custom she might have been baptized in Levkarest and she might have tried to find some shelter in the Vallaki church. Methinks this is a dead end. Some of her friends rumoured of not really nice relationship between her and the Church, but it is still a possibility I will pursue.

***

A young man who tries to appear older than he seems was interested at Borca. He might leave soon for there to try to buy a noble title. I might use his help, he claims being rich. But class is nothing you can pain with gold. I will make sir Gus a lord in change of his help, if he will really help.

***

Note to self. Asking to local Garda to check in report or old records about my child.

***

Tonight my heart has grown heavier. I watch back at my own mistakes, and the shadows of the past seem to be covering my wits and make me distracted. I am positive if I find my child I will be able to finallt rest in peace. No nightmares, no shadows. Just the memory of my dances, of my notes and my fingers on the lute. And the passionate love I know I could give. A recovered past.

A.N.
« Last Edit: January 31, 2010, 06:48:05 AM by +Ciaran+ »
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #2 on: February 01, 2010, 01:02:54 AM »
The pangs in my chest have become weirdly more and more frequent. If I had to find a relation between them and anything which has changed, in a radical way, I cannot really say anything new or consistent happened. I have had the need to be visited by a doctor, doctor Alan Kingscrest. He took me in that inn in one of the best areas of Vallaki named The Blue Water. And yes, my senile self could proof there were commodes in the room. I removed quietly all my clothes, cleaned myself properly. It was some days I had not a proper bath, the Lady's Resting being more affordable for my actual finances but definitely it is missing of many commodities. It was quite a long time I did not who my naked body to any man. I have had quite a healthy way of living myself too not to be in need even of doctors. I watched myself in one of those elegant mirror, and I could not help noticing that the age is striking me, the skin becoming less smooth, even my several tattoes somehow discolouring. My body of a former dancer is slowly decaying. I am becoming a vintage wine.

***

In the half-collapsed church of the worshippers of the Sun I saw many adventurers. I could do nothing to help them. I watched many couples. Young boys playing the heroes to protect their maidens. It was so pictoresque. And then I held Trebuchet in my arms. The found son of a hin. The pangs became stronger, but the little child was calm with me. Doctor Kingscrest says my pangs are psychological in nature, and I daresay I agree with him. It seems being in this place has stressed more my thoughts about the past, my dismay, my guilt sense. He gave me some tonic. Taste was funny, slightly spirited. I slept for hours like a baby myself. I hope not needing more than this. I've resisted many things in the past because used for enjoyment, never for need, now it might be different.

***

A female elf, name was Lia if memory serves me still, seemed to recognize the name of my child. She said she would have asked to some of her kin-frends. They have long lives, they must have long memories. It is two years ago or so my child left her home in Levkarest, and yes Krezk was her direction. Watching what foreigners and adventurers do here make me think my child might have done the same, risked her life daily, maybe found love, maybe she herself has had a child. Too many questions and no one able to answer me.

***

Note to self. Nudging monsieur Poisson for any new information about my child.
Other note. Deciding when approaching a local Garda to ask for information too. Garda seem of another matter compared to those in Borca. This is a good thing.

***

At the Blue Water I have had a dreamless sleep like those I used to have long ago. I feel refreshened. I must find a way to earn some money here. My ancient bones and limbs deserve comfort, otherwise I might have a collapse of my body. I need to fill this hollow I fill inside. It is clear what it needs to be done.

A.N.
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #3 on: February 01, 2010, 11:33:28 PM »
Monsieur Poisson of the Church of Ezra had the ungrateful task to inform me that no records were found in the archives. To be honest I am all but surprised because, despite the awkward silence of her friends, I had quite understood that my child had had some issues there in Levkarest with them. What about, and of which gravity, I don't know, but it would have been unlikely for her to find shelter in a cult which might have been the same reason for her to move away.

***

The outskirts of Vallaki seem a sort of global village where you can find people coming from basically everywhere known, and many other places which are pretty unknown. I like being idle there and waiting for the several merchants to set their wares to be sold. I've become friends with some of the Red Vardo Traders and with the hin Annalise. Unfortunately the place seems also a magnete for robbers and general troublemakers. Two calibans came, yelling the name of a certain "Goblin King", guards and merchants stroke them down, but in a last and desperate effort to cause troubles one of them managed to hit me with something which was likely heavier even of myself. I almost died for the scare and for the scars. It seems my time has not yet come. I have things still to do.

***

There is this young girl who reminds me of my child. Same age, same attitude and behaviour apparently. She just misses blonde hair, purple eyes and a scar around her left eye. Fetti is what they call her. I call her just "Young Girl" as I am used to call basically anyone younger than me. She was surprised when I told her of my past as a dancer, I had to give her a demonstration. Though I've almost wholly given up that art in the past five years I dareday I have still some grace in it. She wants getting classes of dance. I started working with her for this, she has something gracious in her features and movements, but it has all still to be properly educated. A half-vistani young man helped us in the classes. She seems more at ease with slow movements, but I think she has something blocking her mind. She really thinks, probably held by misconceptions or conventions, that her dress weights more than her armour. So it does in her mind. She must be worked upon.

***

She reminded of my child. I have decided I need to tell her the whole truth. I cannot lie to her more than this. I might lose a child again. I am aware of this. But I don't think I really can do otherwise.

A.N.
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2010, 03:14:18 AM »
Finally an unexpected glimpse of hope came to me. I found, by complete chance, a man, probably more or less of my same age. His manners were not of that kind which could strike me at all, as a matter of fact, our first meeting was like the hundred others I had had in the previous mornings in the Foreigners Market Area. (Note to self: I am not sure other people call it that, but I am always of the opinion the fastest way towards understanding is the clearest one, namen omen). Mister Kaleb revealed a sort of important person himself, a high ranked Militia. I met him a second time in front of the barracks because I had planned to meet Fetti for some dancing classes. And there we spoke again, and I told him of the quest for my lost child.

***

The pangs are becoming less regular and less trigger-caused. Last time it was by meeting some wolves while I was with a young woman named Tabby. I had an emotional breakdown and I told her almost my whole story. Her response was cold. What could I expect? She barely knew me at all, and we had undergone already through a warm discussion about family, men and sons. I would rather not repeat my whole story like this, out of emotional distress. It is the second time it happens, the first was doctor Kingscrest. I will need to meet him soon.

***

Mister Kaleb told me he met someone named Imojina but for a long time he has not seen her at all. He hinted at the fact she went around with another young woman, her name being Thereice, Threice or something hardly pronounciable at all like that. My information about my child's last days in Levkarest actually spoke of her affaire with a woman, supposedly the same one found half-burnt in her home. All these troubles she went through make me feel bad, because she missed clearly the support of a mother education. Kaleb promised me to help finding further tracks leading to my child. He is proving really a gentleman.

***

The chances and the circumstances which led me to Vallaki begin seeming less and less random. Even the fact that Kaleb is a sort of higher-rank of Fetti seems to be directing me to something which is not yet fully disclosed. I need to be stronger. I'm perfectly aware that if I find my child it can be a new beginning. But also the last page of a book which must be closed and for good.

A.N.
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2010, 02:21:40 AM »
Some days ago I have persuaded Fetti and la petite Annalise to have some fencing for me to watch. It was so enthusiasming, I had had not any comparable fun for ages. They tumbled, and they jumped and they fought, with agility, strength and occasional elegance and wit. I wonder if anything of this kind, large scale, can be planned here in la Barovie. I figure it is almost impossible. I will be happy to watch some sporadic performance. I spoke to an elf lately, he wants to play Jeu Force with me. It would be interesting. We just need a chessboard for it.

***

The lack of manners in Vallaki's Outskirts is discomforting. I have actually almost given up trying to educate some people. I just need some more observation to check if specific people have any chance to be educated or not. It is not just a waste of time. I have witnessed a man spitting on the woman named, if I am not wrong, Tarinyar, the one Kayne is awkwardly trying to seduce -with very poor results, if I may add. I believe this lack of manners is a guilt which resides in us elders. And I feel guilty. I have not educated my child, and she ended in troubles. It is my fault.

***

After the fencing I felt so ashamed. I was accused -jokingly as I found out eventually- to be one of those older ladies trying to seduce younger handsome men. Non! I am not. I am still fertile, I know that. But my pulsions are nothing important now. I need to find my child first.

***

Note to self: I need to forward my request to Vallaki Garda about information on their records about my child.
Further note to self: I should ask to gentle mister Kaleb to build a chessboard for Jeu Force.

***

The pain within myself has stabilized. I feel slightly better, it must be the warm weather of the summer. I am still alive. And I have something to accomplish before I can even think to die in peace.

A.N.
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676

DM Tarokka

  • Dark Power
  • ******
  • Posts: 6923
  • Fata volentem ducunt, nolentem trahunt
    • Facebook page
Re: In Search of a Daughter. The Journal of a Kartakan Liar.
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2010, 04:57:35 AM »
I feel disappointed. Unfortunately Vallaki Garda has not any records about my child. This means of course I cannot hope to receive further information by them. I spoke to two young women, I don not remember their names, who were about the same age of my child now. I could not help thinking she was used to wear an uniform as well. And that uniform at length put her in troubles. On another hand, the fact she was not in Garda records can also mean she was never arrested, never trialled, and led around here a rather peaceful life.

***

I am walking a lot during the summer days, working for the delivery service is fatiguing, but my body has not yet forgot the hard training I received in my dancing times. I shared twice my road with a man who at first did not appear a gallant, but at length, as often it happens, there was more than met the eye. His name is Josiah. He is a bit bulky as a man and he comes from the north, so occasionaly we have exchanged conversation in the douce langue. He hinted he might need a doctor.

***

Doctor Kingcrest needs still to make me know my exact schedule. I am not sure I can be really able to worke as a nurse, but for what paperworks are concerned my five-year experience in Harmonia could be of help. Plus, I am good with languages and in this way I can help him both with locals and with foreigners. On my manners there is no doubt, I shall just need to learn the names of the instruments and some little other detail. I am positive about this.

***

I start doubting about mister Kaleb's words. I will try to look for him to have my Jeu Force board built, and I will investigate further. The shadows around my very soul sometimes seem to be lighted and disappear, other times, like this, I feel enveloped in dark thoughts and doubts. I remember my childhood days with my mother teaching me my first dancing steps. She used to tell me to focus on the next moves, but anticipating them became natural only after a while. And then, when in my teen days I lived in Port-à-Lucine, the corrupting lights of the town made the shadowy gloom of my heart deeper in comparison. And love saved me. And then it withdrew me again.

A.N.
http://www.facebook.com/CiaranII
Pokemon Go! 5688 6574 4676