Grigori, the Watcher

[vlowe72]

Beloved.  It is good to be home.

Today, my eyes beheld Valliki for the first time in over five years.  Little has changed.  The Count rules with an iron fist and the Gundarakites still chafe under his yoke.  Wars and rumors of wars.  Rebellion and acts of destruction to protest the current law.  And innocents dying all around in the name of some cause.

I have traveled far and learned much.  I sought out those with the skills that I needed and I learned from them.  Very few here that can teach me anything more, but that is all right.  The Land will teach me directly. 

I doubt that anyone will recognize me after all this time.  I could have taken the ferry directly into the city, but I wanted to see the land up close, especially the Outskirts.  While we were together, I rarely ventured into that wild and lawless land, but if I am to accomplish my goals, that must change.  I will make the outskirts my home and hone my skills against the dangers here and perhaps view the enemy up close.

It is hard.  The night is as dangerous as it always was.  Things lurk out there, too terrible to imagine.  Yet I must confront them and more eventually.  I am not yet ready to take on the dangers of Old Night, but someday I will be able to be the fist that strikes in defense of Law and of the innocent.

Innocent like you.

They never found who had set the fire.  You had no interest in political causes, you merely wanted to keep our house and raise our son.  I only wanted to continue running our shops forever.  You never asked me to give in to their demands, and for that I will love you forever.  I know they were behind your death, but this is not about vengeance.  There are always those who want the slow decay to continue, the corruption to remain, all for the glint of gold.  Those in leadership grow fat from bribes and, while the innocent suffer. 

No longer.  The decay stops now.  I will cut it out, like a putrefied limb so that the healing may begin.  From now on, none of them are safe.

But they do not know that one of us has survived and returned.  Please do not be offended but I cannot use our name for a while, as I still might be remembered.  Perhaps I will take up my old identity when I can raise the funds to rebuild our businesses.  For now, I shall be a stranger... an "Outlander" as it were.

I shall call myself Grigori.  I shall watch and wait.  The road to the Village is treacherous, but as soon as I am able, I will visit you there.  You and Ivan will always remain in my heart, and what I do, I do for you

[vlowe72]

The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an opportunity of defeating the enemy.
Sun Tzu, The Art of War


5 year ago...

Over the years I have dealt with several of the Vistani, and had gotten to know a few of them well.  Whether I could call them friends, well who can tell with those ones.  Yet I approached the one I knew best, at their camp outside of the village.  Petre greeted me with sorrow.  He knew what had happened.  The Vistani always knew what happened, before anyone else it seems.

"My friend, my heart grieves with your loss.  Tell me what Petre can do for you."

"I would ask a boon of your people.  The Vistani travel the lands and have seen places that no Barovian has seen.  In all your travels, where can the best warriors be found?"

He eyed me, as if in appraisal and spoke with a hint of sadness.  "So, a path of vengeance you have decided on?"

"Perhaps.  The truth is, that I have nothing else.  All is gone.  Perhaps I can turn this tragedy into something good, and keep others from sharing my fate.  I have not thought much about what I will do.  But I keep moving, for to stand still and think on... things, that way lies madness."

Petre nodded.  "The Vistani understand revenge.  If that is your choice, then two pieces of advice I would give you."  He ticked off each point on his fingers.  "One.  Learn patience.  If you strike too soon, you will only throw your life away in a hopeless bid, to ease the fire in your soul.  Delay, and delay, until your skills are ready to take what is yours."

"Two... you are not a warrior.  Do not seek the path of the soldier, for their ways require strength and endurance, forged over years and years of training.  Instead, I would seek the way of unarmed combat, the ways of stealth and secrecy.  Learn to strike from the shadows, and to disappear before your enemies know you are there.

I frowned.  "There is no one here with such skills, at least no one who that I would care to meet.  I don't want to become an assassin, for that is the type of person who took everything from me."

"Not an assassin..."  Petre turned from me and stared off into the distance.  "Off within the mists, there is an land.  There you will find the best practitioners of this art.  They may consent to teach an outsider, or they may not.  I do not know."

"How do I get there?"

"Only the Vistani can take you, friend.  It will be costly, but it can be done.  I must warn you, it may be years before the Vistani will find their way back there.  You will be trapped, unable to return until such time."

I shook my head.  "I have nothing left here, Petre.  What little fang that I could retrieve is yours, if you can get me to this land.  As far as Barovia is concerned, I am dead.



Present day.

The terrors of the night.  All my life I had been taught to avoid them.  This night, I chose to face it and my first tenative step out into Old Night brought me face to face with this creature.  I thought I was ready for this first true test of my skills. I thought I could fight it.

I was wrong.

She looked at me, her cold eyes glittering in the moonlight.  "Come to me, my lamb.  It is so much easier, if you do not fight."

I assumed the third form, trying hard not run in a panic.  I would not run as my countrymen did.  "I think not."

She sighed.  "They never learn."  Then she did... something to me. My limbs froze and I toppled to the ground.  All my training, my skill, useless.  I struggled with all my will against her, and managed only a single twitch of a finger in my defense.  She bent to him, and bared her fangs, and she...

I cannot bear to write what happened.  I don't wish to think on it any more.  Years of effort wasted, and no one would mourn my passing.  One last thought as the darkness came upon me... And so I die.

Darkness.  I dreamt of death and the grave.  Eventually my eyes opened, and I beheld the stars of the Barovian night.  The thing had drained me to the point of death, but not quite.  I was so cold, I could not stop shaking.

Stupid, stupid, stupid! Lucky amateur.  I should be dead now.  I thought I had mastered the Art?  She saw me as clear as day, and cloulded my mind without any effort.  I have dishonored my master, my art, and your memory.

I should be dead, then I could be with you beloved.  But then there would be no justice.  I will watch and learn, and I will be ready to fight her again.  Someday.

[vlowe72]

Beloved....

I almost abandoned my cause this day.  I try to fight, but I am not good enough and I've had to limp back for healing so many times.  I join with some, but they cannot teach me anything, except how to die.  I came within a hair of simply throwing off the facade and trying to reassemble the pieces of my broken life.  I would have but for two things...

One, I have tracked them to their lair.  I know how to find them, but I dare not confront them yet.  They are too strong, and their unholy powers will kill me quickly.  I have to find a way to hurt them, to kill them, before I can risk a confrontation.

Two, I am making a small difference.  I have saved lives and have aided others.  I have discovered from them the reason that the people of our land live in fear.  They want to run and hide, to not think about the darkness that surrounds them, but a fear can only be conquered if it is faced.  I have faced the darkness, and though it terrified me, I survived.  I shall face my enemy and see that he can be hurt.

I will make them afraid.  They will cower in their dark holes, as we used to cower in our home when the sun set.  They will see that there is another thing in the night, something that they will learn to fear.

Still I miss you terribly.  Are you able to see me, what I have become?  Do you approve, or do you shudder in revulsion?

Have you seen the other, the woman who sometimes comes with me on the hunts?  She reminds me much of you, though her hair is white not black.  But her smile, her heart, it is much alike, I sometimes ache when I see her, longing to feel your touch again.

Could she be trusted with the truth?  Can I have someone to share my secrets with?  Knowledge is a burden, especially what I carry, and she would draw my enemies to herself, if she knew the truth.

Another day, perhaps.  For now I watch and wait.

[vlowe72]

If two people love each other, there can be no happy end to it
-Hemingway

Beloved,

Have I betrayed you?  Will you hate me for all eternity for what I have done?  If you and Ivan are watching me, do you seethe in anger, or do you approve? 

Something has happened, something that I did not expect, could never have imagined in a thousand lifetimes.

I did not realize how lonely I have been these years, much like a starving man does not realize how hungry he is, until he is brought food.  I have been watching alone, simply accepting that as my lot... until she crossed my path.  I told her all my secrets, and she helped bear my burden.

Ah... beloved.  I would not hurt you or your memory for anything.  Say the word, and I will remain alone forever, waiting for the day when I can rejoin you and Ivan.  But there is only silence... the silence of the grave.  Thus I will decide what to do, as best I can, alone.

I ask myself, if our positions were reversed, what would I want you to do?  I would want you happy, and not want you to be alone.  To see you in the arms of another man, I must confess however, would cause me no end of grief.

I do not know what I will do.  I must decide soon, because there is another heart involved in this, and the longer I wait, the greater will be her pain, if I must leave.

You will remain my beloved for all eternity, this I swear.  But can there be another?

I have not the wisdom to answer this.

[vlowe72]

Diary entries from 6 years ago.

Day 18

He came into my shop again today.  The man makes my skin crawl, but if one wishes to succeed in business, you learn quickly to put on a fake smile.  I welcomed him warmly, as if we were old friends, and asked what Vichan could do for him.  He wanted me to make him a key.

The simplest of tasks for a locksmith, except for one detail.  He wanted me to make a key, that would open the locks that I had made for the nobles houses.  I could do it, in fact I kept wax impressions of my most complex locks in case I needed to remake one.  The man wanted a key to those locks, because so far they had defied opening by their less than legal methods.

There would be only one reason for them to want such a key.  Criminal activity no doubt.  I quickly pointed out the nearest exit, despite the offer of large sums of money.  It is not always about coin, it is about a reputation.  If the nobility were to even -suspect- that I was doing such things, it would mean the end of my business.  And perhaps even worse.  Lord Strahd does not abide thieves well.

Day 20

I have had no choice, but to do as the man requested.  They are criminals, and they flaunt the law with disdain, but they are organized and they knew my wife's name and my son's.  To threaten a man's family..., they are the worst indeed.  I will give them their keys, but I will also send a message to the Burgomeister and the Village constabulary.  Perhaps I shall address the Count as well.  Who knows how far these ones will go?  At the very least, if I am discovered, I will be able to absolve myself of guilt.


(The following entry is written in a shaky hand)
Day 25

They are dead.  I am discovered.  All I have built is gone.  Even now, my shop is burning as is my home.  The shouts echo through the streets, but as it is night, no one will venture forth to help.

Ah beloved, I have failed you.

They no doubt believe me dead.  If they discover I yet live, they will rectify that quickly.  I will keep this journal hidden, and away from my person, so if I am killed, others will learn the truth of what is hidden in Barovia.

The rats prowl the darkness.  It is right that we fear the night.