Author Topic: Duty Above All:  (Read 2203 times)

Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #25 on: May 23, 2018, 06:09:29 PM »
More business to conduct, people to help and things to learn about today!
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #26 on: May 24, 2018, 03:53:20 PM »
I am becoming a more accomplished alchemist.
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #27 on: May 25, 2018, 01:55:49 PM »
Frustratingly, I feel the potential is there for me to be an even greater physician, alchemist and mage but progress goes not as quickly as it could.

I can't sit comfortably. The next circle of magic is staring me down, taunting me, so tantalizingly remaining just a little outside my grasp.  I am almost there but when?
I am a disciplined arcane and traditional scholar but lack of a proper mystic tutor might be the issue holding me back. One can only get so far with intense self-directed study.

I have to do my wife, my family, my country, King and god proudly.
Be the best Doctor, mentor, mage and boss/master I can be.
Also Give Mytteri no quarter.

I wish to dispel some of the negative misconceptions people have of my people and our land and show these ignorant savages that yes, there are positive attributes of Hazlani culture and the Mulan people.
Some fundamentally idiotic and maliciously barbarous stories of us have been propagated in Vallaki by troublemakers and those who are infected by Mytteri. Those who allow themselves to succumb to its temptations allow their mouths to flap spreading harmful seeds of discord.  Don't they understand that in an orderly system there is elegance and that every member in a community is meant to make the whole greater in their own way? Laws, rules and behavioral protocols are by design made to help keep people from straying too far off the deep end.

Let chaos not seduce you. It will promise much but in the end always destroys those it speaks to. It does so without mercy, without hesitation.

We all have our roles and functions to serve in the social machine. Each of us is as a component and when all is meshed properly, the gears' teeth not misaligned, everything is well-oiled then much greatness is possible.

Everybody has a job to keep the community running smoothly, from the lowest slave to the mighty governors.
There has to be a sense of unity in purpose and an understanding that you affect more than just your selfIsh direct own limited sphere.  Otherwise how do you expect to achieve hegemony?

 Power, greatness, fortune? These are worked towards. Systematically progress moves forward.

I fully believe this is a recipe for success.
I think these people all cosmic detritus from various realms spat from the mists and deposited into an apparent planar nexus centered around Barovia's Vallaki oft lack this sense of purpose.
If they believe it to be every man and each group for themselves, then no wonder there is much strife.

This isn't the fault of the Garda. They try their best.
« Last Edit: May 25, 2018, 02:52:17 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #28 on: May 27, 2018, 05:48:35 PM »
I have to be great.
For the sake of those who have invested in me.
There is my wife Shanaz, always so emotionally supportive, financially prudent and clever.
My hunting friends Gutter, Arc, Kilinus and Jack and Slyuin. Arc and Kilinus are wanted men now though and it is their fault for being stupid about their dueling in the outskirts and letting their tempers get the better of them. However, the memories of that pair as they were before their fall from grace... they were good, though arguably simple men.
My alchemy apprentice Lomir and my medical apprentice Kismet both often looking up to me as their mentor.

I worry to myself that I am? Might be? Cannot be! Unworthy but for their sakes and my people's sake, I need to swallow down those insecurities and get done what needs doing!

I feel like there is a part of my destiny which still lies in the sands of the amber wastes clusters and another part which lies in Barovia.
Obviously part of it is in my home country of Hazlan too.

For my country and king, I have to become the best doctor, alchemist and mage I can be.
For my friends, my loved ones and even just my patients and associates.

A simple quest for greatness... but nothing is simple though on the surface it may appear that way.
What we do now and have done has wrought into motion many different trickling down effects, some subtle and others not so subtle.
« Last Edit: May 27, 2018, 05:53:07 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #29 on: May 29, 2018, 03:27:13 PM »
It definitely feels as though I'm not as powerful as I could be.
This bothers me. The next arcane circle continues to remain ever so slightly outside my reach.

If I ever want to be a court wizard or have recognition by the Red Academy and my King... They place a very high emphasis on continual improvement so such... Stagnation... Is unacceptable. I need to accelerate my learning more.
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #30 on: June 02, 2018, 10:35:58 AM »
Still not there yet, which is frustrating.

I did get some nice crimson dragonhide bracers though.  Then an offworlder explained to me what a dragon actually was. So, giant smart lizards who have sorcerous spell-like powers they can shoot from their mouths.
Also, my alchemy has improved notably.

Ugh, I told the man I was traveling with that the Port sewers were very dangerous and not to try to do them alone. Then he expects me to save him... He was there when I almost died nearly 6 times during our most recent latest prior attempt and that was with a group.
So I'm guessing he's probably mad at me that as I'd predicted, it would go badly.

I wish I hadn't come back there. Now I'm in trouble too. I knew that it would be getting in over our heads. Why wouldn't he listen? Why didn't I be more firm in my refusal?

I had very good reasons for not wanting to go down there again and really not wanting to at night. That makes it even worse.

What is my father, Satrap Quoa going to think? I don't want to die in a foreign sewer wading through Dementlieuse refuse.
My poor wife. I don't want her to be widowed.
That was a selfish, foolish and very Mytteri thing to do!
I lost all my money too. I don't know how I'm going to get home, let alone to the mist camp.

Oh right, huge surprise that a scholar isn't physically sturdy (in melee combat) and that a caster is no good while exhausted. I feel useless, frustrated and am tired of being considered a burden. This is stupid.

Well there's a bank of mist at the edge of Baie De Parnault near the Vistani wagon and boat that sometimes takes a person through the mistways... I guess if worst comes to worst I can traverse it on foot. Typically if you travel the mistways long enough you get spat out of one of the Har'Akir desert mirages. From Har'Akir I can pick through sand for coins in a tedious and agonizing manner and once I have enough make my way to Muhar village. This is not good.

Of course, being able to hitchhike my way through the mists is going to require being alive... So try not to die alone in the incredibly dangerous alleyways and snaking maze-like sewer complex filled with overgrown monsters and beasts of tremendous size and terrible disposition!

Why would anybody heed the advice of a doctor who can speak five languages and has been to many countries?
I'm crying and shaking with rage. I don't think I can continue this entry.
« Last Edit: June 02, 2018, 12:44:10 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #31 on: June 03, 2018, 05:04:56 PM »
Of all the insulting...

It seems the storyteller and bardess Zafirah has been the victim of an attack by some deranged ex-physician who likes messing up the faces of attractive women.*
I was told of this by my friend Sir Arroway.  Despite my having been abroad the entirety of this incident the same sorts of malicious fools who made up the horrible things about me before attempted to implicate me as a suspect but the Vallaki Garda whom know me as well as Zafirah herself have thankfully cleared my name; It would seem I have been thus acquitted of such ludicrous accusations.

Oh but here is the twist... I have specifically been asked to NOT offer my surgical skill in reconstructing her face. Mustn't acknowledge the Hazlani, afterall.

I'm the son of a satrap... In my own country one would be beaten for such insolence... Yet nasty gossip runs rampant in Vallaki. Also to acknowledge my medical competence wouldn't fit their "Black Hazlan" narrative.

Well at least in Dementlieu of all places I was offered a job in the grand biblioteque by the head librarian. He took one look at me and upon my completing a simple quiz was rather pleased saying I could be one of their archivists. I think knowing five languages helps as does being a very fast reader.

I hope whoever the citadel does end up choosing for the operation is at least competent enough to know that you use a thin diameter suturing thread to leave the most minimal amount of scarring.
Women and children's bodies are especially delicate.
Quacks will use the thicker thread because it is easier for their clumsy hands to manipulate despite leaving larger much more noticeable scars.

As usual Jean Renaud and Morvayn are the culturally, socially accepted heroes to deal with the case.
How unsurprising.

I am not so much irritated about that as I am that after so much apparent progress with the people of Vallaki and direct work toward improving my reputation there are still people very eager to see my blood spilled. Two-faced... Well, I mustn't overly dwell on that.

*Correction, June 10th: Morvayn, Zafirah and Noram have clarified to me who the deranged barber chirurgeon is after as victims seems to be women having red hair. The mutilation he does to them is principally he scalps them.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2018, 03:22:02 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #32 on: June 05, 2018, 07:47:48 PM »
I enjoy doing business in Port with Mssr. Swiftfoot.
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #33 on: June 06, 2018, 04:21:03 PM »
Father has declared me his heir. I now wear the neckband of command.
Hmm!

Though we are of the least nobility, being of the rural aristocracy still carries an awesome responsibility. I am his only son. The wellbeing of the serfs on our land will fall to me and my wife, Shanaz when Satrap Jan Quoa, my venerable father, decides to retire.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2018, 02:55:47 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #34 on: June 09, 2018, 09:32:36 AM »
It would seem the misty border has closed off Vallaki from the other clusters and the rest of the core. Iron Lord help those poor souls trapped inside; We can only guess what horrible things they may be being subjected to.

Note: Very low traffic in the mist camp today. I hope the others are alright. Silly and foolish really. I wonder how many of them would wish the same well-wishes were it me who was the one lost in the accursed fog. Eh, this idle speculation is pointless. I have been to Har'Akir, Hazlan and Port back and forth several times.

The mistways are chocked full of terrifyingly powerful creatures even more so than usual.
So far I have catalogued:

Countless mist horrors, greater.
A vassilich (these are said to always be thrall to a true lich somewhere but despite being a bit less powerful than their creator are still incredibly dangerous in their own right!).
Some more advanced form of invisible stalker.
Juju Zombie champions.
Morhgs (A particularly vile form of cadaverous undead that is skeletal yet still retains much of its innards and some of its musculature).
Bodaks.
A vampire matriarch* and her coven of twisted undead adventurers seeking out live prey.
Ancient walking trees.
A night walker.
Many types of pudding slimes more ancient, large and terrible than even the ones in Port-A-Lucine's sewer system.

*What was particularly awful about my encounter with her is she could still kind of see through my improved invisibility, hasted herself and chased me yelling how I didn't need to keep my skin and the coven would feed well tonight. How I managed to escape just barely by the skin of my teeth is anybody's guess.
« Last Edit: June 09, 2018, 11:05:55 AM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #35 on: June 12, 2018, 02:52:25 PM »
I have done it and achieved the next arcane spell circle, finally!

Ugh, Noram and Morvayn are contemptuous of me.
It bothers me the way people demonize my homeland.

My ongoing goals remain become an excellent wizard, exceptional physician and attain great wealth.

Even here in my private journal where I record my thoughts I feel a pressure bearing down on me of would be readers, spies or eavesdroppers judging me negatively for not having what they would consider acceptable views to fit within their proscribed subjective collective narrative.

Expressing such opinions as I love our country and like our king, for instance.
Also that I feel no need to apologize for being Hazlani.

This makes those who would portray our lands as belonging to the single most oppressive savages in the core upset because it flies in the face of their "Black Hazlan" popular tale they quite like to spread.

You are an outlier. You do not fit. You will be made to fit... Or else you will unhesitatingly be destroyed. We are soulless, merciless and will brutally force everyone around us to conform to our beliefs. How dare you be different. We can use threat of physical violence, actual force and social intimidation to mold reality of those around us, Agios.

I do not like it. Ikkes, I do not.
Mutterings of Mytteri emanate off so many people and things. Am I the only one to realize it? That can't be. Surely others notice but choose not to talk about it.

How quaint. You think you see the bigger picture. In the end it will likely not matter. This is a war of ideas hedge mage. It started a long time ago before you were a twinkle in your father's eye. It will continue long after your body is dust. To attempt to resist is laughable, really. It is also sad.

Things had already been set into motion long before I stepped onto stage. The question is who is benefitting from these lies? It's obvious who likes to obscure the truth.  There is a power in falsehood.  You use it to dispatch of those you dislike in grisly ways when one lacks honor.

It is probably not my place to attempt to get to the bottom of this dark rot infesting so many societies in the lands of mists. I suspect pursuing that mystery too deeply will inevitably lead to my destruction.
Best to put a pin in it for now.

Someday I would like to meet our king. Not today and not tomorrow but after I have done many great things for our people or perhaps contributed to an advance he could use in his own mighty arcane research and experimentation? Who knows. The future is something not clear to us mortals and perhaps even gods deem not to reveal their full hands for all to see.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2018, 03:10:48 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #36 on: June 14, 2018, 04:23:12 PM »
Eureka! I've unlocked the secret of greater scorching varnish!
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #37 on: June 16, 2018, 10:44:32 AM »
The next chapter: Maddening Isolation:

Noram's dead. We think it's the same person who scalped Zafirah who had bumped him off. I worried that it seems this frustrated would be killer is going to keep stalking her and picking off her friends and allies one by one.. But is it for the ultimate goal of having a second shot at killing her? I strongly felt staying at the Blood O' The Vine Inn (Noram was gutted on the front steps like a fish) was a bad idea. I got her out of there. I wonder... Undoubtedly it was intended a grisly message for her that she is never going to be safe.
Her tormentor has a very macabre sense of 'humor' if it can be called that.

She has been difficult company, temperamental, fussy. I can't say I blame her.
Such a wild untamed bird having her wings clipped and being caged in such a fashion... It must be unbearable for Zaf.

Seeking clarity I mistwalked. The mists spat me out a few different places. Once to Barovia, a few times to Perfidus and then to Hazlan.
I sought answers in the Tusmørke Skoven Forest.  I hunted owlbears and meenlocks. I conjured shades of owlbears and krenshar cats to serve as hunting companions.
Earlier I'd hunted mist creatures with Dextan and Constantine.
Ugh, now I am very alone. I have heard tales of a creature called Gorgon in the East.
It is said to resemble a bull with metal skin and is exceptionally deadly.

What do I seek? Some sort of omen, boon or symbol of reassurance perhaps from the Lawgiver or King Hazlik... I know, it sounds silly.
I need to continue pursuing my goals.

Please, do not let it end here.
« Last Edit: June 16, 2018, 02:38:04 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #38 on: June 18, 2018, 10:21:45 AM »
I don't know how many days it has been. Apparently the mists saw fit to thaw me out since evidently my safari of the gorgon turned out rather badly.
I am going to have trouble wrapping my head around that one for some time yet.
I came back to Vallaki and plied my varnishes since my permit was still good. Another merchant was furious I was underselling him. He charges way too much though which is his own fault for being greedy.
Also Jean is right back to demonizing me again and poor Caelia had many fearful questions about my needing to necessarily own slaves, be some sort of runaway slave catcher and other unsavory things.. Directly from listening to that old Richemuloise snotball's constant venom and vitriol.
I think I did get her to laugh a little though. Perhaps? Maybe.
Ugh so it's the lying game again, is it? Sometimes I feel like if he wasn't so very constantly down on me there wouldn't be this ridiculous at times absurd push to the opposite extreme to be extra good towards people.  By my own nature I am helpful though.
« Last Edit: June 20, 2018, 02:35:44 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #39 on: June 20, 2018, 02:35:05 PM »
I met a gudkaede from Sly-Varr named Ossur Fezim.
We had a long delightful chat in Vaasi and he was fascinated with how much experience I have had in cultures different from our own back in Hazlan. Then we went for a safari.

It is angering to him too the way people exaggerate us in Vallaki to be extreme slavers and therefore despicable human beings. Here I thought maybe I was the only one who felt that way about it!

We Mulan are really quite civilized; It's just a shame that other people who have never been to Nordenvall or Ramulai come up with such extremely negative and in general at least partly misinformed preconceived notions.

Unlike the Akiri and Pharazians in our society slaves and the indentured have opportunity to earn their freedom through producing goods and services of worth.
In those more savage lands the only escape is death and you are enslaved for life. I've seen Akiri slaves penned up in fenced areas like so much farm livestock. They treat their laborers as chattel.

Though some Mulan taskmasters are cruel you will find it not uncommon that lords provide serfs with their own housing on farms and estates. Slaves are allowed to have families. A skilled artisan or craftsperson can live quite comfortably.

We're not all out to clap everybody in irons and commit them to being in press gangs, nonono. That's entirely too uncivilized and barbaric.
I resent the term slaver. That implies you are a vulgar auctioneer who traffics in people as property.

Also, the idea every Hazlani must necessarily be seeking to wipe out any nonlawgiver religion is equally stupid and grotesquely misinformed.  So long as the other religion understands the iron lord is the king of the universe and other gods bow down to him we'll have little problem with things.

I do understand how that can be something of a bitter pill to swallow.
That our lord of iron has the moniker of Lawgiver should tell you something about us Hazlani. Namely, we are a deeply rules and order oriented people. A codified system is the cornerstone in any civilization, jao?

We loathe chaos. Vaasi has one word for both chaos and evil: Mytteri.
« Last Edit: June 20, 2018, 04:52:52 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #40 on: June 21, 2018, 05:48:14 AM »
That feeling of people being filled with hatred at not who you are but what they think you will be fills me with waves of revulsion when I encounter it.
I'd like to proudly declare to many of these interlopers how completely full of dung they are but it is neither my place nor inclination to do so.
Besides, the imbecilic passions driven morons would just use that as an excuse to slake their bloodlust and kill off the person upsetting their preconceptions.

I remember as a young brat on the plantations at times loathing my gnomework. Jao, we Mulan often hire gnomes as in-house tutors for our youths.

Anyway the bulbous gnosed grey eyed little man who was my teacher would adjust his spectacles, sigh and ask why I spent so much focus on mastery of my crossbow.

Young master, don't you want to be a great Mage, like the wizard King? He would ask.

But tutor, why can a wizard not also be a bit less helpless in combat? I could imbue the ammunition, jao?

Ikkes, he'd say, first things first son of Quoa, you need to get the hang of your basic cantrips before you can move on to a first circle spell, let alone that.

I enjoy the crossbow. Back then it seemed so far away but here I am able to cast from the sixth circle.

The younger me was impatient. I wanted results NOW, not later.
The practice of my archery with my father's head guard was more immediately rewarding.

Perhaps that is my crutch.  Sometimes I feel more comfortable casting magic on the weapons and ammunition of my allies than in personally getting my hands dirty.
I'm not much of an up close fighter, either.

I think my tutor did not actively discourage my pursuit of the crossbow for hunting out of fear I would complain to my father the satrap and he would be whipped or worse.

On the contrary, the house tutor worked in physics lessons. He showed me there are maths which can be used to guess the trajectory of a quarrel bolt as it is launched from a crossbow. We talked of physical science and a little of anatomy. Lessons about directional forces and lots of chalk drawings on slates of arrows he called "vectors". As a child this oft flew straight over my head but I think back to it now and then as an adult.

Also introduced along with these lessons in physical and life science were cleverly worked in principles of arcane casting. Alongside those exercises and models about applied directional forces were concepts of mana lay lines.
« Last Edit: June 21, 2018, 06:06:20 AM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #41 on: June 22, 2018, 01:58:17 PM »
Work hard. Bring glory to your family and kingdom.
You might be just a dirty halfblood but you have two great talents; your skills as a doctor and your prowess as an arcanist.

Jean Renaud when you confronted him for being a dehumanizing bitter old man told you if you did it again he would kill you and scatter your remains where nobody would ever be able to find them. Pleasant.


You want to be thought of as a hero Agios? Simply traveling the core in a crusade against disease is not good enough.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2018, 02:01:57 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #42 on: June 23, 2018, 11:51:19 AM »
I don't feel well mentally.
There has to be more to life than just seeking greater knowledge, wealth and power.
So too does helping people begin to feel a tad monotonous and meaningless.
So absentminded was I that I accidentally sold my favorite pair of dragonhide bracers to Petre then when I realized what had happened had to scramble to quickly buy them back. That little mess ended up costing me 5k.

I have run out of food.
Finances are lower than I would like at 9.7k but the cycle of repeatedly doing deliveries, selling goods and raiding dungeons too has also gotten rather monotonous.

I have not seen Shanaz since before the mists sealed off Vallaki.
Now that the way is open again I have started looking for her. I know she has to be around. She just has to.

A morose malaise has come over me and I find myself even not really wanting to talk to nor interact much with anyone.

I've noticed this persistent melancholy affecting my thought processes.  Is it loneliness? Ikkes, nothing so simple. Despair? Jao, that seems a part of it.

Well, there are concrete steps I need to take even if it is just to go through the motions of living life.
Do the maintenance and upkeep tasks.
That Krofburg sack of letters has been sitting undelivered in my bag for who knows how long. I can get food provisions through hunting deer.

You are the son of Satrap Jan Quoa.
He has declared you his successor.
You have a faithful hound and loyal, clever, beautiful wife.
You are an excellent chirurgeon and decent alchemist.
So why does all this self-doubt continue to bother me?

The things I used to derive meaning from... They are still meaningful, intellectually I understand their importance but I feel... Burnt out, overtaxed emotionally and mentally somewhat overburdened.

These idiots tell me I need to be evil because they are opposed to how our kingdom practices slavery and I as a citizen in it, am not.
Why should I throw away every comfort just so they can continue to hate and distrust me anyway?
Hateful ignorance to advise a path to guaranteed self-destruction. Such naivety and willfully simplistic binary moral views can at times strike me as disgusting.

I do not myself personally own any slaves.
I work to better slave living conditions when and where possible.
I help both the indentured and free even handedly when providing to them healthcare, thereby running my medical practice at a loss.

I feel that gradual changes made working through the system rather than directly opposing it are a better way to go about altering things for the better. Abolition via violent insurrection simply does not work. Historically it has never worked in Hazlan. Those outsiders do not understand our history. They are mindnumbingly ignorant moralists and impractical in their unsolicited instruction.

I do not tell other people how to philosophically live out their lives.
If you are going to do that but knowingly not provide a safety net of fallbacks or support for those you would incite Mytteri into... Please do shut up and get out of my way.

I am not opposed to it? No, more I am less so opposed to it than they are.

I am opposed to masters being excessively cruel toward their serfs. That bothers me. We are supposed to be the more civilized ones.

People can be incredibly hatefilled and spiteful, petty creatures.
I can't keep doing this. Not going it alone. The gloom hangs over everything, an almost palpable miasma.

I do not tell other people how they MUST live according to my particular "morality" so why do they continually force their views upon me so?

Is my personal crusade across the lands of mists against disease through the core and all its clusters a misapplication of my efforts and time? If there is a greater cause and purpose, I wish it would present itself. I've been doing this for years.

Must it always be go it alone and be self directed? That last safari I went on with Ossur and Dextan feels like it was so long ago.
Some honest and nonmalevolent guidance to assist me in seeking greater clarity would be good for me, I believe, but who to turn to?
« Last Edit: June 23, 2018, 12:45:04 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #43 on: June 24, 2018, 03:08:01 PM »
I fear drudgery and isolation more than any monster or insidious plot.

Some drudgery is a necessity but it is not all there is to life.

It is in our human condition to experience loneliness. I understand that through it, grief and loss people are tested to their limits and that some do lose their minds.

What if the mists don't really speak to us and it is all but a twisted reflection of our own dark impulses which we externalize?
There is something deeply psychological that is both at the same time it is alien also hauntingly familiar to  them. They are profoundly alien and chaotic yet at the same time speak to all those of us who walk among them. I don't know why that is but I and others have described it as troubling.

This bears further reflecting upon.
« Last Edit: July 12, 2018, 03:56:25 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

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Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #44 on: June 27, 2018, 04:11:45 PM »
Pursuit of commerce always helps me feel better. I have hired on more hunters and day laborers. Ossur says industriousness is a virtue.
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

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  • Posts: 511
  • Sometimes mad wizard, occasionally fun.
Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #45 on: June 28, 2018, 03:08:09 AM »
Two people were incredibly rude toward me. I felt the rage boil up inside me but swallowed it down. I would like to see them pay but these are both strangers who hardly know me and act as though they think they own and run the entire place pulling other people along on strings. In hindsight I would not want such sycophantic imbeciles in my company or around my presence anyway.

I don't even need revenge. The universe has played a cruel joke on them by allowing them to go through life as themselves.

Some day they will irritate a force of devastation much stronger and more unforgiving... Now there's a pleasant thought; I cheerily clean my surgical tools and alchemy glassware while humming over their imagined torture screams!
« Last Edit: June 28, 2018, 03:10:23 AM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

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  • Posts: 511
  • Sometimes mad wizard, occasionally fun.
Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #46 on: June 28, 2018, 11:28:55 AM »
Woke up aching and sore and angry again.
Just keep being friendly.
It'll piss your foes off more.


It's always ever so amusing when you get attacked and rebuked for having an opinion that isn't liked and then people try to invalidate your experience! By which I mean it isn't.

I'm so *beyond* tired of this.
Do offworlders have any idea how obnoxious they are when they get all judgmental of us core natives and prance around all high and mighty like they feel they are so much better than we are?
I do believe I am starting to understand why Barovians hold such disdain for outlanders.

Where to them an outlander is anybody who isn't a Barovian or Gundarakite an offworlder I consider to be anybody who isn't from this plane.

The last thing anybody wants is a non-native of this realm getting preachy at them the way in which we live is wrong and blah, blah, blah; You're just grumpy you got caught in this cosmic sinkhole and cant figure out how to get home!

If I really wanted to be some sort of invalidating jerkface I'd yell at them to get over it. Yeah, no, that doesn't work.
Do I blame these offworlders for feeling this way? No, I do not.

The supposedly evil Hazlani physician who DOES NOT own or take any slaves is sick of your bullsh*t, people.

Lately I have been experiencing a nigh overwhelming urge to tell these folk to pike off. My more religious friends of varying faiths have told me it is best to let these feelings go, however.

Look you, this is a dark dimension and if you are wanting to survive you are not going to last very long trying to lecture us about how we need to be more cheerful and happy. You would do well to heed our advice since we are natives of this realm and have eked out livings in it for family generations while you have not.

Simply put some people are just imbecilic self-righteous gits who have no business telling others how to live; they all tend to congregate in Vallaki's western outskirts.

I wonder how the Barovian Vallaki Garda stand these guys...

Don't get me wrong some offworlders are nice but man oh man these other ones... It leaves one to idly speculate how come the monsters eating them do not die from a case of terminal indigestion.
« Last Edit: June 28, 2018, 11:52:23 AM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

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  • Posts: 511
  • Sometimes mad wizard, occasionally fun.
Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #47 on: June 30, 2018, 06:17:14 PM »
Funds increase but I need to keep working hard. I don't want to hit a skill wall plateau again. That was a feeling I do not wish to repeat.
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

  • Dark Lord
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  • Posts: 511
  • Sometimes mad wizard, occasionally fun.
Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #48 on: July 07, 2018, 09:35:42 AM »
I have taken on a new apprentice.

I also have a snappy retort for when imbecilic offworlders and others call me "slaver": I am not here to fulfill your sick bondage fetish, cretin.
===
I've definitely made gains in my arcane power of late. Instead of being directly to do with my chosen school of magic though it seems to have manifested in an ability to summon augmented illusory shadow creatures. This has definitely something to do with all the time I spent contemplating light and darkness while mistwalking and apparently I have myself been transmuted in a subtle manner... It seems I share an increased tie to the plane of shadow!
The other change has been I seem slightly more resilient to negative energy compared to before and the difference is notable.
« Last Edit: July 07, 2018, 10:33:47 AM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.

Silas Rotleaf

  • Dark Lord
  • *****
  • Posts: 511
  • Sometimes mad wizard, occasionally fun.
Re: Duty Above All:
« Reply #49 on: July 12, 2018, 03:29:07 PM »
Disgusting lies which take advantage of fear and ignorance to cause increased misery on purpose and sew anarchy...? These are bad things and yet so many people do it with great abandon.

I am attempting to get the hang of casting empowered spells. One thing holding me back as a wizard is that I only do standard ones aside from my augmented illusions.

So much frustration! The wait to achieve the next stage of arcane prowess can be maddening. I do feel myself getting more familiar with some of the stranger things this dimension has to offer though.
In particular knowing which spell to cast at what time is becoming easier for me. This is an essential skill for almost any mage. That's what the great arcane scholar Zacchary Sorrill said in his books.

The rigamarole of doing deliveries, the occasional raiding of a monster laid or two and plundering dungeons in groups does have a certain rhythm. I used to enjoy it more.  Either something is wrong with me or I am becoming depressed and disillusioned.

I would love to expand my casting repertoire by being able to memorize and prepare more spells at a time. I've a decent variety I can already access at my disposal both those useful for general purpose and ones ideal for specific scenarios but that maximum number is a pesky limitation some times.

Of course, this is something supercilious to complain about since I do have just enough capacity to cast the right amount of spells most of the time; Perhaps it is my greed for greater power and knowledge that balks at this restriction then.

The seventh circle of arcane magic will be at my disposal soon but by my estimation probably not soon enough.
Sure my other colleagues who are arcanists tell me I am diligent but this is not good enough for me because I want to bring honor and glory to my family, the kingdom and my king!
You have to stand out by being truly exceptional at things to be deemed worthy. This also paints a big smite me sign target on your back so one should do so very carefully. Ever so carefully.
« Last Edit: July 12, 2018, 03:59:20 PM by Silas Rotleaf »
Meatshields have feelings too!
#NotAllRogues.
I think calling it 'evil' is a bit harsh.